Tag Archives: forgiveness

Holy Week for Marriage

6 Apr

Praise, temptation to despair, indignant questioning from one who does not understand His mission, rejection, and eventually death . . .

While all of these descriptions certainly apply to Our Lord’s experience during Holy Week, they also apply to the lived experience of every married couple.

St. John Paul II said, “Married couples are a permanent reminder to the Church of what happened on the Cross.” Jesus called Himself the Bridegroom, and His Bride was the Church, so we can imitate Christ in our marriages when we:

  • Accept praise from others with humility and thanksgiving to God.
  • Allow grace to strengthen our hope when we are tempted to despair over financial situations or the choices our children make.
  • Choose to courageously witness to the beauty of marriage even though friends or extended family may not understand our vocation.
  • Forgive generously when we are hurt.
  • Lay down our lives, in ways big and small, for our spouse.

For other ways to joyfully witness your marriage, go to www.JoyfulMarriageProject.com

The foregoing is this week’s installment of the “Marriage Minute,” produced by the Marriage and Family Life Office of the Archdiocese, which attempts to view the Sunday readings through the lens of the Sacrament of Marriage.

 

The Original Fall of Marriage

2 Mar

untitledIn this week’s readings, we hear about the fall of our original parents, Adam and Eve. We sometimes forget that this initial temptation and subsequent sin was not only an attack on the first two humans, it was attack on marriage and God’s beautiful plan of communion between the first husband and wife.

Adam and Eve were called to cultivate the Garden of Eden and protect it, with divine assistance. We can approach our marriages in the same way. Our Sacraments are gifts from God, and we have the calling to cultivate and protect them with divine assistance. How do we do this?

  • Unlike Adam and Eve, ask God for help when trouble arises.
  • Give each other the benefit of the doubt when a misunderstanding arises.
  • Be the first to ask for forgiveness.
  • Be quick to offer forgiveness.

For other practical ways this Lent to cultivate and protect your marriage including ways to pray together, go to www.JoyfulMarriageProject.com.

The foregoing is this week’s installment of the “Marriage Minute,” produced by the Marriage and Family Life Office of the Archdiocese, which attempts to view the Sunday readings through the lens of the Sacrament of Marriage.

A Joyful Penitent

19 Jan

calling of disciplesThis week’s first reading and psalm speak of great rejoicing, of long-suffered sorrow being lifted. They are connected to the Gospel in which Jesus begins His public ministry.

We often view joy as an emotion that comes upon us during favorable circumstances, such as a promotion at work or better yet winning the lottery. But this is not the way Jesus understood it. Joy is something we cultivate.

Jesus’ first message for His first disciples is the first step to cultivating joy in our lives: repentance. If the idea of repentance doesn’t come to mind when you think of joy, you’re not alone. The connection is foreign to many of us, yet this is where the “peace on earth” that was promised us a few weeks ago at Christmas starts.

Pray this week for the grace to see where you may have hurt your spouse (especially look at what you’re not doing, but should be) and then humbly ask forgiveness.

The foregoing is this week’s installment of the “Marriage Minute,” produced by the Marriage and Family Life Office of the Archdiocese, which attempts to view the Sunday readings through the lens of the Sacrament of Marriage.

The Hidden Pharisee in Marriage

20 Oct

vacuum“O God, I thank you that I am not like this tax collector.”

The Pharisee in this Sunday’s Gospel is so arrogant! Yet it is easy to be the same way in our own marriages. We often judge our spouse’s actions against what we would have done in the same situation, imagining that our way is right and theirs is wrong. We can say to ourselves, “If only my spouse were more like me, things would be much smoother.”

For example, “O God, I thank you that I am not like my spouse . . . who thinks a vacuum is an appropriate birthday gift . . . or who cries whenever we fight . . . or who always makes us late.”

We all have our own version of that “prayer.” For trivial matters, we can ask our spouse why he or she behaves a certain way, and in the process learn more about him or her. Even when our spouse is sinning, we can look deeply into our own hearts and say, “O God, be merciful to me, a sinner,” and then grant forgiveness.

The foregoing is this week’s installment of the “Marriage Minute,” produced by the Marriage and Family Life Office of the Archdiocese, which attempts to view the Sunday readings through the lens of the Sacrament of Marriage.

The Prodigal Son . . . or Spouse

9 Sep

reconciliationCan you imagine the betrayal the father in the “Prodigal Son” story must have felt? The son wishes his father dead, takes his money and squanders it.  If you are married or have children, you have probably felt hints of this pain. We have all had times where we felt our spouse or children have squandered our trust and found it difficult to forgive.

In marriage and family life, part of forgiveness means giving up the right to bring the offense up later, using it to justify ourselves or holding it over our spouse’s head to get our way. The Father’s example is to run out to meet the repentant son, lavishing forgiveness and celebrating the return. In marriage and parenting, we do this by focusing on our spouse’s or child’s repentance. It costs us pride, but wins for us the joy of a restored relationship.

The foregoing is this week’s installment of the “Marriage Minute,” produced by the Marriage and Family Life Office of the Archdiocese, which attempts to view the Sunday readings through the lens of the Sacrament of Marriage.

Taming the Monster

9 Jun

aaaOften the worst part about an argument with our spouse is the pain we inflict afterwards. We magnify the original hurt by rehashing it and adding to it, allowing doubt to creep in like a growing monster lurking in the darkness. We can ask, “Are we even still in love?”

Part of this pain can be avoided by realizing that in a fallen world, spouses will hurt one another, but it does not have to result in permanent division. We are reminded in the Catechism, “what therefore God has joined together, let no man put asunder” (no. 1614). While God does not want us to sin, He is also not surprised when we do. So, we expect sin, but don’t let it divide us. How do we do this?

Forgiveness is the answer. Jesus says in this Sunday’s Gospel, “But the one to whom little is forgiven, loves little.” Forgiveness humbles us. It makes us more compassionate. In short, it makes our relationship stronger. So while we shouldn’t sin on purpose, we also shouldn’t panic when we do. Instead, we should make reconciliation our most urgent task.

The foregoing is this week’s installment of the “Marriage Minute,” produced by the Marriage and Family Life Office of the Archdiocese, which attempts to view the Sunday readings through the lens of the Sacrament of Marriage.

Unlocking the Gift of Peace

29 Mar

aaaa“Peace be with you.” Jesus offers peace this Divine Mercy Sunday. The peace of Jesus is different from the peace that the world promises. Peace is not simply an absence of war, although that would be nice. The promise of Jesus is a peace that surpasses all understanding: a peace of the soul and a gift the world cannot give.

The pathway to this peace is forgiveness. In the same way that Jesus passed through the locked doors and offered His Apostles peace, He wants to pass through the locked doors of our hearts and broken relationships that are erected through sin and give us the gift of interior peace.

We participate in this peace in two ways in our families. First, we always have the gift of peace that comes through the Sacrament of Reconciliation. Second, when we use the words, “I forgive you” and “Please forgive me” with our spouse and children, and teach them to use the same words, we allow Jesus to bring His gift of peace into our family life.

This Easter Season, and especially during this Year of Mercy, let us be generous in seeking God’s forgiveness in Confession, offering forgiveness in our family relationships, and praying that a spirit of forgiveness will be more prevalent throughout the world. When we do this, we participate in the victory of Easter over death and despair.