Tag Archives: sacrifice

Are you willing to die?

16 Mar

This week, St. Paul reminds us that “While we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Rom. 5:8). As married people, we are called to imitate Jesus by laying down our lives for our spouses, a theme that runs through many of our most cherished love stories.

We see great nobility in one spouse taking a bullet for the other, even though it usually doesn’t come to that!

If we are literally willing to die for each other, we must also be willing to die to ourselves in little ways–while our spouse is still a sinner.  Here are some ideas:

  • Pick up those socks without comment.
  • Answer a bad attitude with lavish affirmation.
  • Do one of your spouse’s chores without getting noticed.
  • Seek understanding instead of the “last word.”
  • Listen to your spouse without trying to “fix the problem.”

Build a more joyful marriage at www.JoyfulMarriageProject.com.

The foregoing is this week’s installment of the “Marriage Minute,” produced by the Marriage and Family Life Office of the Archdiocese, which attempts to view the Sunday readings through the lens of the Sacrament of Marriage.

The Super Bowl of Life

2 Feb

super-bowlIt’s kickoff time! When you hear that, you’re probably thinking of the Super Bowl, which is one of the most “sacred” events of our secular culture. However, in addition to crowning a football champion this weekend, it’s also time to kick off National Marriage Week.

While National Marriage Week doesn’t have the pomp and circumstance that the football game has, perhaps it should. While Super Bowl Sunday is a great opportunity to come together with friends and watch incredible athletes achieve the heights of athletic performance, it also challenges us to strive for excellence in our own marriage.

What if we approached our marriage in the same way that these incredible athletes approached this game? What if we prioritized and sacrificed to achieve the heights of marital joy with the same intentionality these athletes have sacrificed to be crowned as champions?  For your joyful marriage training protocol, go to www.JoyfulMarriageProject.com.

The foregoing is this week’s installment of the “Marriage Minute,” produced by the Marriage and Family Life Office of the Archdiocese, which attempts to view the Sunday readings through the lens of the Sacrament of Marriage.

The Little Way

13 Sep

aaaDo you remember your wedding day? Your honeymoon?  We were so mindful of our spouse and each of us would have given our lives to save the other if necessary.

Fortunately, many of us will never be asked to lay down our lives for the sake of our spouse. But we are asked every day to do so in smaller ways. Jesus gives us incredible advice to keep the flames of marriage burning bright in this week’s Gospel: “The person who is trustworthy in very small matters is also trustworthy in great ones.” The pathway to a great marriage is through the small daily things.

This week, let’s prioritize the “little things”–often hidden–that make your spouse feel cherished or respected:

  • Hiding a written love note in his lunch bag
  • Getting her a cup of coffee in the morning
  • Wearing that shirt and tie she bought you for Christmas
  • Affirming his daily hard work for the family

The foregoing is this week’s installment of the “Marriage Minute,” produced by the Marriage and Family Life Office of the Archdiocese, which attempts to view the Sunday readings through the lens of the Sacrament of Marriage.

 

Stand Firm

12 Aug

Image result for sacred heart of jesusHave you ever been the butt of family jokes because you attend Mass faithfully, make counter-cultural parenting decisions, or have “too many” kids?

If your faith has ever made you unpopular, you’re experiencing what Jesus describes in the Gospel this week. Sometimes our faith becomes a dividing line between us and family, and this can make us feel torn or even guilty for causing the disruption.

We need to remember that Jesus is calling us to authentic unity with our loved ones, and unity ultimately comes from Him. It may seem as if our getting serious about the faith has caused the problem, but really we are just the first to take a step toward authentic unity.

Like Christ Himself, we can help to bring our loved ones along through our silent, loving witness and by offering the pain of being misunderstood for their conversion.

The foregoing is this week’s installment of the “Marriage Minute,” produced by the Marriage and Family Life Office of the Archdiocese, which attempts to view the Sunday readings through the lens of the Sacrament of Marriage.

Mission Statement

1 Jul

nfpWhat is the mission of your marriage? Do you have an actual mission statement? A popular trend for married couples and families is to form a mission statement. In this Sunday’s Gospel, Jesus clues us into the mission of every married couple.

Jesus sends His disciples out 2 by 2 to proclaim the Kingdom of God, which means they were sent to announce the presence of God among us. With sacramental Marriage, the couple becomes the presence of God in the community as the sign of Christ’s love for the Church. God’s plan for every married couple is to bring His life and love into the local community through the way they love each other.

St. John Paul II said, “Couples are a permanent reminder to the Church of what happened on the Cross.” Does this mean that marriage is torture? No, it means that couples are the concrete reality that God’s love is tender and moves toward unity with the Beloved. This week, live your mission heroically!

The foregoing is this week’s installment of the “Marriage Minute,” produced by the Marriage and Family Life Office of the Archdiocese, which attempts to view the Sunday readings through the lens of the Sacrament of Marriage.

The Mission of Marriage . . . If You Choose to Accept It

31 Mar

Recently durinaaaag Mass, Maggie, my 5 year-old daughter, grabbed my hand while we were listening to the homily. I thought she just wanted to hold my hand, but I was wrong. She gave my hand to Libby, so we could hold hands during the homily. It deepened my realization that little ones want desperately for their parents to not only be together, but to be “IN LOVE.”

It is sometimes easy to forget that one of the greatest gifts we can give our children is to constantly strive to grow in our marriage no matter how good or not so good it already is. No matter where we are or have been in our marriages, the natural instinct of my daughter, Magdalene, can give us deep insight into the supernatural reality of this Easter Season. Let’s explore.

What is it about an “in love” married couple that gives so much security to our little ones? I think it has something to do with the fact that a married couple is intended to be the very reflection and concrete experience of the love and goodness of God. Every married couple has the mission to be a window into the life and love of the Holy Trinity. If the reflection that the couple is intended to convey becomes cloudy, then the child’s confidence in God’s loving providence is clouded. Children want to believe that they come from love. If a child knows that their existence is the fruit of love, then they are confident that they exist for a reason.

We all know that children are created out of the love of God and that there is a reason for the creation of every child. Yet we as parents sometimes forget that we are supposed to be the living and tangible reminder every day to that reality by the way we love each other. It is not just about participating with God in the child’s creation, and then focusing on the child and figuring that our spouse is old enough and can take care of their own needs. When we intentionally choose to nurture the married relationship, we create the culture for a child to grow in a stable environment. If we were going to plant a garden, we would not be very successful if we did not tend to the soil. Passionate marriages are the optimal soil for the seed of children to flourish!

Yes, I said “passionate.” Some are scandalized by that word, so let me explain why I purposely chose it. When I say “passionate,” I am not talking about “an urgency to make love.” That is how the world defines it, and it is important to reclaim the language. When I say “passion,” I am talking about the type of passion that we celebrated on Good Friday. And no, I am not saying that marriage is torture. I am saying that the total self-abandonment of Christ on the Cross is the same self-abandonment that a married couple is called to have toward each other. The grace that was won on Calvary and offered through the Resurrection is made present to and through the Sacrament of Matrimony. St. John Paul II expressed it best when he said that married couples are a “permanent reminder to the Church of what Christ did on the Cross” (Familiaris Consortio).

The mystery of Christ’s Death and Resurrection is present in every home, and what a wonderful plan in the wisdom of God. God knew that the Blessed Sacrament would not be able to make it into every home, but through Baptism and Matrimony, His sacramental presence has the potential to reach every house and neighborhood.

Our marriages are personal but not private. When we embrace the call to love each other as Christ loved the Church, we participate in the sanctification of the world. We can sometimes dismiss evangelization as a good idea that some people should do out there somewhere, or we wait around for our parish priest to form an evangelization committee. The reality is that when we love our spouse passionately, we evangelize our children and our communities, and we participate in the redemption of the whole world!

I invite every married man and woman, most especially myself, to step up the level of love in our relationship this Easter season. The grace is abundant, and when we take the time to prioritize our marriage, we enter deeply into the mystery of Christ’s Death and Resurrection. If we enter into this mystery more deeply this Easter season, we will experience the power of Pentecost in a tangible way, and we will be a beacon of light in a world that struggles mightily to find the path to authentic happiness.

Why not strengthen your marriage this Easter season by attending a marriage enrichment retreat or workshop? A common mindset is that these retreats or workshops are for couples that are struggling, but that could not be farther from the truth. Healthy marriages intentionally “do something” for their marriage each year. They don’t just wait until it gets bad. Just as regular maintenance on the family vehicle helps to avoid the need for bigger more costly repairs down the line, so regular enrichment keeps good marriages strong!

Upcoming opportunities include the Living in Love retreat April 2-3 in Emporia and June 11-12 in Topeka. Another option is the Recharge Marriage Workshop, which is a 4-hour experience that includes CHILDCARE! The next one is at the Church of the Ascension in Overland Park on April 23. Check it out at www.archkck.org/recharge.

The Living Stations of Marriage

23 Mar

aaaHave you ever attended a “living Stations of the Cross”? Many parishes have their youth groups act out the steps of Jesus on His way to His crucifixion and death. Seeing these truths acted out in a dramatic form can be a very powerful experience for the faithful in attendance.

Did you know that as a married couple you are called to the same thing? St. John Paul II said, “Spouses are a permanent reminder to the Church of what happened on the Cross” (Familiaris Consortio).

It can be hard to imagine the kind of sacrifice that Jesus made for us, but when we see a couple choose to forgive a serious offense, or pull together during a difficult pregnancy or care for one another during a life-threatening illness, suddenly Jesus’ Passion is played out in front of our eyes.

Likewise, couples mirror the Resurrection. Anyone who has had the honor of celebrating a 50th wedding anniversary has seen the joy that is the fruit of years of suffering offered for the good of the other.

As we begin this Easter season, let us reflect on the crosses in our marriage and choose to bear them as Christ did, that we might show the world that His love brings new life.

The foregoing is this week’s installment of the “Marriage Minute,” produced by the Marriage and Family Life Office of the Archdiocese, which attempts to view the Sunday readings through the lens of the Sacrament of Marriage.